


And if you're evil I'll forgive you by and by

by ambiguously



Category: Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: Gen, Homicidal Droids, Kid Fic, Minor Character Death, Sibling Rivalry, Treat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-15
Updated: 2019-02-15
Packaged: 2019-10-22 00:59:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17652998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ambiguously/pseuds/ambiguously
Summary: Putting together a homicidal astromech and a toddler with no self-preservation instincts was never going to be a good idea.





	And if you're evil I'll forgive you by and by

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Odyle](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Odyle/gifts).



Chopper's databanks included a vast library of information about organic species. Digitally, he could list the significant developmental stages of over four thousand species, although his primary protocols were only concerned with three. Lasats, for example, hatched their young from eggs, which emerged fully past the larval stage, remained juveniles for approximately ten standard years followed by two years of adolescence, spent the next fifty standard years as adults, and the last thirty as elderly.

Twi'leks and humans both birthed their young live in a disgusting process Chopper hoped never to witness again. According to his data library, the helpless larval stage of both species lasted one to two standard years, the juvenile stage another ten to twelve, the adolescent stage for up to an additional ten, until finally they reached adulthood and stayed there. He'd spent a brief time around larval organics when they had retrieved the Force-sensitive infants, but no more than that. His primary interactions with younger members of these species had been in the adolescent form, first Hera, then Sabine, then Ezra. His observations suggest male adolescents matured much more slowly than females. Hera's larva was male. That indicated issues for later. For now, his observations were that the larva made noise all the time, even when Chopper was in low-power mode recharging, and he required much of Hera's attention, which meant Chopper wasn't getting his usual maintenance cycles as often, and he generated messes which Chopper was tasked with cleaning.

One night Chopper complained about being awakened from yet another charge. Rather than do the sensible thing and remove the noisy newcomer from their cabin, Hera moved Chopper's station to another room. He complained about his maintenance cycle being late again, and Hera ordered Zeb to do it. They both wound up with sparks, Zeb cursing in his language and Chopper shrieking back in Binary, and the commotion woke up Jacen from his nap which only added to the noise.

The situation was becoming intolerable.

"Behave," Hera told him, when Chopper grumbled at the larva for emitting its stomach contents onto the deck.

Chopper told her to tell her infant to behave.

"He is behaving. He's behaving like a baby. Don't you do it, too."

Chopper grumbled at her. She had already dug into his protocols and ensured his wiring would not permit him to harm the child in any way, either through electrical shocks or accidentally leaving him in the airlock, or any other thought which buzzed through Chopper's mind. His protocols now told him his primary function overriding all others was to protect Jacen, superceding if necessary the well-being of the rest of the crew including Hera. His logic circuits objected strongly, and his own self-protection protocols were firmly in place, thank you very much, but her programming was insistent.

He grumbled again.

* * *

The larval stage slowly gave way to the juvenile. Chopper noted the changing landscapes as the Rebellion traveled from base to base, and as he chased the curious toddler to keep him safe from hot geysers and giant carnivorous lizards. Chopper himself might have given up on his fantasies of eliminating Jacen, but Jacen's own self-protection protocols were either damaged or missing. It didn't help matters that Hera had yet to devise a child lock which couldn't be over-riden with telekinesis. Chopper would be happy to let Jacen wander but his protocols kicked in, and within moments Chopper would be scooting after him, cursing to himself.

Verbalizations were improving. Previously Chopper had to guess what a particular cry meant based on observational data. Not even demeaning himself to ask for translation help from C-3PO had improved his success rate. Now Jacen could request food, call for his mother, or summon Chopper or another crew member with varying vocalization accuracy.

Chopper rolled by the boy's cabin, which was spread over with large blocks too big to fit into his mouth. The mouth turned up into a wide grin as he saw Chopper. "Hi, Top!"

Chopper asked him what he wanted, but while the child had learned to verbalize in Standard, he had yet to learn to listen in Binary. He laughed at Chopper's beeps then his attention was taken by a couple of blocks he was stacking. Chopper waited to see if there was a reason he'd been called over, but that hope dwindled as Jacen started making nonsense singing sounds to himself while he played.

At least he wasn't trying to look inside a giant lizard's mouth to get a better look at its teeth this time. Chopper grouched at him anyway, knowing the child couldn't understand him, pointing out he should learn to say Chopper's name properly. Also he should finish his 'fresher training already, and help out around the _Ghost_ beginning with cleaning his room. Jacen ignored him, playing. As Chopper scooted away, he let out a noise that sounded exactly like a particularly nasty word in Binary that Chopper flung at every organic that annoyed him, which was all of them.

Chopper rolled back, and asked Jacen what he'd just said, but the child didn't respond. Instead, his nonsense song now included the swear word. To test a hypothesis, Chopper said his favorite word again, which made Jacen laugh and sing in a louder voice. Chopper let out an electronic chuckle before his self-protection protocols activated.

Hera was not going to like this.

* * *

He had more to worry about than the swearing.

Human faces generally did not take on the shade of red that Kallus had as he pointed to Chopper. "That droid of yours is a menace."

Chopper chortled to himself, which earned him a glare from Hera. "I'm sorry," she said. "I'm sure he wasn't trying to kill you. He thought it was funny." Her boot twitched out to the side, kicking his strut. "He won't do it again. You have my word."

"Hera, you know I have nothing but the deepest respect for you, but that's not good enough. I'm not going to take this situation higher, but you know someone else will. C1-10P thinks a lot of dangerous things are funny. What are you going to do when he hurts Jacen?"

"He can't. I changed his protocols."

"Fine, then when he tries to jettison Admiral Ackbar for looking at him wrong."

"He won't."

* * *

He would have to thank Kallus for the idea. It had been very funny watching Ackbar's face. Even Hera had to admit that. She didn't look like she was laughing though. She rubbed her own face with her hands as she knelt in front of Chopper. He knew her emotions better than any other organic, and she looked sad. "I've been asked to pull your memory core."

Chopper wheeled back in fear, hitting the bulkhead behind him as he chirped in terror. He had only stilted, broken memories of when his memory core had been corrupted by the Imperial virus. Removing it entirely? Some droid might be rolling around in his casing and following orders, but it wouldn't be Chopper.

Hera reached out and patted his casing. "Hey. Hey! I said no. Your memory core is who you are, and I like who you are." Her thumb stroked him. "You're my best friend. But the only way I'm going to be allowed to keep you is if I can tell them you can't hurt anyone." He beeped. "No, not even if you don't like them." He beeped again. "No, not even if they gave you a mean look. I'm sorry, buddy." She popped open his casing. His sensors told him her hand was inside, then he powered down abruptly.

* * *

There was nothing wrong with his photoreceptors, but Chopper sensed a kind of mist over his vision. There was nothing wrong with his struts, but he couldn't seem to roll quite as fast as he used to. Nothing in his diagnostics pointed to anything wrong. But he wasn't himself, and he knew it.

Zeb bumped into him, not watching where he was going, almost toppling Chopper over. He made a rude noise at Zeb, and Zeb cowered away as Chop reached for his electrical prod. It wouldn't activate. He made another rude noise and went back to his work. Behind him, he heard Zeb laughing at him.

"It's about time the crossed wiring in your brain got fixed."

Chopper wanted to stay and argue and found he didn't feel like it. The annoyance was there, and deep inside he felt the flow of anger in his emotional circuits, but the flow went to storage instead, and was dampened before he could turn around and thwack himself into Zeb's legs. Unhappy and out of sorts, Chopper left him there. He could get back to work later. 

"Hi, Chop," said Jacen, as Chopper rolled by his open door. The large blocks had been replaced by smaller ones, and a few random toys Sabine had sent, all cluttering the deck.

Chopper said he ought to clean his room. Jacen burbled back Chopper's favorite Binary swear and waited for Chopper to chuckle.

Chopper told him he ought to watch his language, and he rolled away.

He heard steps behind him, and Jacen caught up. A hand touched his casing. He stopped rolling and waited. If he rolled away too soon, the child could fall, and that was against his protocols. He let out an unhappy moan.

Jacen walked around and frowned into his photoreceptors. "Are you okay?"

Chopper replied that he was perfectly fine.

"Do you want to play?"

Chopper said no, he did not want to play right now.

"Okay." Jacen wrapped his arms around Chopper, pecked a kiss on his orange plating, and wandered away back towards his room.

* * *

The fleet had split after their escape from Hoth, and this new base held only a dozen ships dotted around separate hangars as they'd done back on Garel. "I don't like reusing old plans," Hera had told her troops while Chopper instructed their droids, "but it was a good plan and we need a place to stay until we get word for the regroup."

Like Garel, this planet sported a thriving city life, and a handful of toys wasn't half as interesting as a group of small juveniles of several species walking by while Jacen peeked out the front bubble. Chopper followed him through the crowd as he blended in with the other juveniles, Chopper's own homing tracker in place. Being stuck on the ship was boring, and even with the strange numbness Chopper had experienced since before their arrival on Hoth, he felt better getting out in the fresh air. If Hera noticed they were gone, she could contact Chopper, and he'd bring the child back, but if she didn't notice, who was to say how long they'd be out looking around?

The juveniles played some game Chopper could not divine the rules of despite watching closely. He could not allow Jacen to come to harm, but he knew the difference between a frightened scream and a happy one.

When the stormtroopers appeared, the other juveniles scattered. Jacen went to run but one of the stormtroopers grabbed his arm first. Chopper froze in place, out of sight beside some abandoned crates the kids had been using as home base for their game.

"Where are your parents?" the trooper demanded.

Jacen shut his mouth. He was little, but he'd been told his whole life that stormtroopers were bad news, and he shouldn't tell them anything.

Another stormtrooper pulled up a holopad. "Bring the little _sikpa_ closer. I could swear I've seen him on a Wanted list somewhere."

Chopper was on several of those lists, for various crimes against the Empire. If they pulled him up, he'd be found out. His logic circuits said to attack preemptively, but his protocol overrides locked him down. He was not allowed to hurt anyone, even if they called Jacen a very rude name.

"We'll bring him in," said the first stormtrooper. "There's rumors of Rebel activity in this city. It's not safe for a kid to be out here alone." One of the others let out a low laugh.

"I want to go home," Jacen said.

The stormtrooper tugged on his arm. "Let's go, kid."

"No!" The trooper yanked his arm harder. Jacen scowled up at him. "You're hurting me!"

The mists covering Chopper's photoceptors cleared. The overrides grinding in his processor flowed free. Months without end of banked angers and unfixed rages surged from their long-term storage areas and fueled his chassis like an energy storm. His conflicting protocols reset into one pathway, and driven by his logic circuit, told him he must protect Jacen at all costs. Chopper felt like himself again as he rolled out of his hiding place by the crates.

One of the stormtroopers glanced his way, and just as quickly dismissed the old, harmless astromech he saw rolling towards him.

Chopper told Jacen to shut his eyes. Sometimes Chopper made a mess as he worked and he wouldn't want to splash.

* * *

They scooted together through the crowd, Chopper feeling more alive than he had in months. Jacen was wide-eyed and giggly, and Chopper told him not to say a word to his mother about what had happened. They boarded the _Ghost_ quickly. Chopper started the take-off sequence even before Hera boarded.

"We just heard five stormtroopers were killed close to this location. We have to evacuate before the Empire thinks it was us." She toggled the comm. "Zeb, last chance to board. Hurry up."

She noticed the take-off sequence programmed in, and the heading already set, and turned to stare at Chopper, who had the sense to turn his chassis away so she didn't seen the stains on that side. Jacen was having trouble in his seat, and Chopper knew she would soon see the stains on his clothes. There'd been a little splash. More than a little.

"What happened?"

Jacen grinned and clapped. "Chopper and I played together!"

"Tell me all about it as soon as we're in hyperspace."

Chopper sank on his struts. Hera was not going to be happy about this at all.

* * *

Later, as Hera was putting Jacen to bed, he asked her if Chopper could charge in his cabin from now on.

She glanced at Chopper, who sat there in surprise. "Do you think that's a good idea?"

"Yep. He's nice."

"That is not a word I have ever heard anyone say about him before. What do you think, buddy?"

Chopper beeped that it was fine with him. Hera sighed and made Jacen clear a space on his floor while she brought the charging station across the corridor and installed it. "If you change your mind, I can put him back into my room."

"Okay."

After a story and hugs, Hera left them there. Chopper hummed to himself, enjoying the memory of the energy flowing through him like the old days.

Jacen said, "Chopper? Let's do that again tomorrow."

Chopper let out a noise of agreement that sounded like a purr.


End file.
